Wednesday, May 20, 2009

Disappointing Your Child

Ugh. This is NOT the fun part of parenting. My oldest, the ballerina, was, for the first time, going to get to attend a very nice ballet summer intensive with the Tulsa Ballet this summer. We have been working on the plans since before February (since that was when auditions were held and I wanted to try to have plans made before letting her get her hopes up). We were hoping she could stay with some family that lives MUCH closer to Tulsa than we do. I just found out that's not going to work out. So, knowing the hesitation that was becoming obvious, I had thought to myself that I would drive her back and forth every day if worse came to worse. One problem with that: who would take care of my dad each day??? There is no other family around and my mom has to work.

I'm not sure I can get a full refund of what we've already paid, (in fact, I'm pretty sure I can only get half) but most importantly, how do I tell my child who has been so looking forward to this for nearly 6 months that it's going to fall through at the last moment? Please pray for answers and/0r her understanding beyond her years.

Thanks,

Jerri

9 comments:

Loveandadoor said...

Oh Jerri, I am so sorry.
I will pray with you!!

Wendy said...

Oh, no no no... I'm so sorry. So very sorry. Remmi is just precious to us. She is so sweet, and I know she worked so hard for this. Do you have someone who could stay in a hotel with her there for a week? It would probably cost as much as driving back and forth. And, if you paid the hotel, that's like a free week vacation for someone. Just brainstorming.

If it comes down to it, I'd plan something else in it's place before you tell her. Make a week of activities, that will be possible with your Dad's schedule. One day she could even spend all day with me, and I'd do her hair, give her a makeover, and do a photo shoot. We can make it special.

I'll be praying. I love you and the girls!

Anonymous said...

Can you take your Dad with you? He might enjoy a lovely drive into Tulsa. I will pray for you too.

Charlie

Jerri Dalrymple said...

Thanks so much everyone for the prayers. Wendy, thanks especially for the offers and ideas. What Jason and I are talking about right now is him setting his alarm to get up and go take care of dad (for lunch) and then a friend of mine or Rendi checking on him in the afternoon. Long rides that end with getting out of the car are very hard on dad. He went with my mom to take Grandma to the airport in Tulsa and by the time they got there, they had to just let her off at the door and turn around and drive back home because he was "shaky" and such. My mom really hated to have to let my grandma off that way, especially since she uses a cane/walker thing. (? lol) Anyhow...please keep praying as we consider our options. I've thought about the hotel thing, but I'm not sure if it would be as cheap considering I'd have to pay for meals and such. The summer intensive part is from 9-2 (these are the most important classes) so we could still be home for supper each night. That being said, I may have to stay at least a night or two in Tulsa b/c all that driving would send me over the edge!!!! LOL

Anonymous said...

Jerri, I wonder if anyone from CHESS knows a homeschool family in the area she could stay with? I know that would be a big deal - has she ever stayed away from family that long?

Another option is an adult daycare for your dad. I don't know where the nearest one is though. Would anyone be available to take him in & pick him up? Maybe even the van that picks seniors up for things like this?(I cannot think what they call it now.)

As you know, I've been there before & this is the hardest part. It's so hard when your kids have to give things up to do all that needs to be done for parents. I've had to make this hard choice before & I know what you're feeling. However it goes, just know you're doing your best & it will be ok in the end.
Hugs- Jenny

Wendy said...

Jerri, I'm so glad you and Jason are going to make it work, by setting timers and redistributing work. Maybe one of those days, you could bring the other girls and we could meet at the zoo while Remmi is in class?

Jerri Dalrymple said...

"Mrs. Savage," you are FULL of WONDERFUL ideas!!! Why didn't I think of that? That's a great way to make the best of a tough situation. I think I might be able to get into the Philbrook for free on one of those days, too!!!! (and I've always wanted to go and take the kids there!) We haven't been to the zoo since......um, the first year that CHESS went as a group.... 3 years ago? Great ideas! Let's plan on it!

Jenny.... Remmy has stayed away from home that long, but only when she was with the youth group from church (which she has known most of those people for most of her life). It might prove hard with someone we don't know, and I'm not sure my husband would approve. As for the senior day care, I've thought about it and mentioned it to my mom. The closest one I know of is, I think in Springdale, or is it Bella Vista? I just know it wasn't close enough to be a realistic idea. I have seen a van in Gentry that says "Gentry Seniors Day Center" on it, but didn't know there was such a thing or where????

Thanks for the great ideas and suggestions everyone...it's been such a HUGE help....2 (or 3, 4, or 5) heads are better than 1! ;0)

Just what are those Woods up to? said...

I'm so glad you guys are working it out!!! What a sweet mom you are!

Jerri Dalrymple said...

Thanks, Julie!