Sunday, September 21, 2008

Bye, Bye Kitty

Well, the kitty didn't make it. At least we had 3 fun days of cuddling. I'm not sure why he didn't make it, other than nature itself. Like I mentioned in another post, sometimes you can do everything right and follow all the rules, but things don't go the way we think they "ought to." I found myself questioning everything I had done in the 72 hours we had him. Did I feed him too much? Did I medicate him too much? Did he get too hot with the heating pad (therefore literally cooking him)? The questions are as endless as the possible answers. In the end, to have some closure, I had to apologize to God and ask His forgiveness for not being a good replacement for this baby's mother. You know what I realized? God created each creature in it's kind to be cared for in a certain way. Sometimes those creatures go against God's design...they, like us, have a choice to ignore their natural instincts. I had done the best I could, but would never be the nurturer that this kitty needed or that God had created to take care of it.
This led to another thought process of, "How many times have I gone against God's natural plan for me?" Wow...hard to answer this side of heaven....scary to think of how high that number might actually be. I hope and pray and seek God's will each day, asking that He keep me in line, but how often has my knee-jerk reaction been to make a decision based on my feelings or what I know? Far too many, I'm afraid. I'm so thankful that He stays so close by my side.

I had a birthday recently and realized that wisdom really does come with age. Maybe not "worldly" wisdom, but definitely God-ly wisdom. This is not to imply that I am wise, but definitely wiser than I was 10 years ago. Wow...that person existed in reality? Hard to believe, looking back. I'm so glad and thankful that God has drawn me and continues to draw me ever closer to Him. May we all follow His natural design for our lives.

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